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The Dutch build houses like winter doesn’t exist
The Dutch build houses like winter doesn’t exist

The Dutch build houses like winter doesn’t exist

And I admire them of their courage. But in a much more real sense, I’m appalled.

I come from Finland. We get naked in the sauna, we get naked to swim in a lake, and we get naked in our own homes. It is our GOD-GIVEN right to get naked. But in the Netherlands, you can’t do it. The apartments are too cold. Dutch people say “if you’re too cold, put on more clothes”. But what if I don’t want to wear clothes? This is my home! I deserve to be naked.

Here you wake up in your bed and your breath turns to vapour. Then into little icy spikes that fall on you. There’s snow all over the blanket, which is curious because you closed the window and it hasn’t even been snowing outside. You check the radiator and it’s turned to the max. You just figured a ghost must have turned it lower while you were sleeping but that would be too good to be true.

You would think an apartment building built last year would install thicker glazing or better heating, since in the thousands of years of human settlement in the region, they would’ve figured out that it gets really God damn cold for a couple of months every year. Even the folks in the Game of Thrones are better prepared for winter. There used to be a saying in Finland that when Finland wins the Eurovision, hell freezes over. I say hell freezes over when the Dutch build their first winter proof house.

End of rant.